Send Kirk to Cry Sitting Down in the Shower- 4hrs Ralphie: I think I followed the wrong blue haired fat man home from the grocery store… Kirk: I lost all my hair at 37! They built an amusement park before bringing me back! Can you believe that, kid? 36 was a good year-I had most of my hair at 36. Kirk: No, I’m the new Kirk and I’m not going to let this get to me. Kirk: Cheap storytelling is all I deserve.
I’m really sorry to be breaking the fourth wall like this. Kirk: 36 levels? How many characters did they have to go through to get to me? Did they even have names?
Marge: You’ve been gone for 36 levels and you have the gall to give me parenting advice? Usually it’s Bart who needs to be reined in. Kirk: Milhouse is now the bad kid! My kid is really moving up in the world.
Milhouse has been a real bad influence on Bart lately. Kirk: But it’s a new Springfield and a new me! From now on, when I cry in the shower, it will be standing up! I am Kirk Van Houten after all- I may not always be rolling in so much spare change. Milhouse: Thanks, Dad- that was fun! Maybe we should make it a weekly thing? Send Kirk and Milhouse to Eat at Krusty Burger- 30 mins Kirk: On second thought, how about the finest restaurant most recently shut down by the health department? Kirk: How about over dinner? Good ol’ dad’s gonna treat you to the finest restaurant in town! Let me check the change purse… Milhouse: That’s a long story, but I can tell you all about it! Kirk: Is this Springfield? What happened here? Kirk: then I woke up in my old bachelor pad, locked in the trunk of my racecar bed. The last thing I remember was arguing with your mother. Kirk: All the Van Houten’s are late bloomers. Milhouse: Dad! You’re back! Just when I thought I would have to go through puberty without male guidance. Now that you have built the Bachelor Arms in Part 1, you will be put into the main questline for Level 36… The building will cost you $253,500 in game cash and take 24 hours to build. Reverend Lovejoy: Instead of talking to THE father, why not talk to HIS father? My wife’s tells me he’s in the doghouse again at the Bachelor Arms. Reverend Lovejoy: Right, and Jesus was a bad influence on Judas I’m starting to think that he’s a bad influence on Bart. Reverend Lovejoy: Alright fine, as a favor to God, what is your concern? Reverend Lovejoy: Look Marge, when you asked to help with the Church’s bake sale, I expressly forbade meddling. Marge: I’ve noticed a lot of children happily wandering around without the judgemental eye of a parent questioning all their choices. Marge: I’d hate to seem “uncool” or “unhip” or “without wiggy” but… Millhouse: No parents, no homework, and no ear medicine- just all the candy we can eat! This will go down in history!īart: That’s a tall order considering our video-game-shortened attention spans…Oh hey Millhouse, you look different.Īs soon as you finish the quest, Marge will start into next one. Millhouse: It’s a holiday I just invented, and it occurs every day! Millhouse: Exactly! And today is Millhouse Day!
Millhouse: This is what I look like when I’m happyīart: What do you have to be happy about? You’re Millhouse. New inhaler? New medicated scalp shampoo? New spine shaper?
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